The Age-Blog Thing

I'm not good at lying. I can only lie when I'm being sarcastic or when something very big is at stake.

So when I started this blog one of my best friends, Mya, told me to lie about my age since I was going to put my real name - why wouldn't I? It's a great name for my blog lol. So I did lie about my age. I said I was born in 1990.

Later on.. she found out and said that was too young.. so I changed it to 1987.

Now I can't be arsed to lie but Mya urges me not to put my real age, birthday, etc. So I'm not going to tell you my exact age, etc.

However this Venus is between 20-25 years of age. Is that good enough?

Kisses, V.V.

P.S. Well done America for voting for Barack Obama! Change is good! The near future looks bright!

The First Argument

I love Matthew I really do but now that I'm hanging out with my first love again, I've been getting little hints of feelings towards him.. you know those feelings I used to have for Enrique - that's the toxic name of my first love.

I don't love Enrique again. Definitely not. No. Never. At least I think I don't.. no.. I hope I don't. Argh, if only he had just stayed in Japan or drastically changed his personality. He's changed, he's grown up but it's still him in there. Still my first love.

He's become a bit of a womanizer when we're out and about with the group - which he's a part of now what with being our flat mate and all. He knows how to chat women up and score - a bit of Barney (HIMYM). Being a best friend again, I've become a bit of a wing-woman. I sometimes do a Robin (HIMYM) and introduce the girl to him. It helps me see that he's different and he's just a friend.

When we are alone, however, it's a different matter, he becomes that sensitive guy that I fell in love with. That guy I thought was perfect for me. That guy that was perfect for me.

I don't understand why I'm thinking these things. I don't understand why even though I'm so in love with Matthew, a part of me, a small part of me, wants Enrique back.

Two of my best girl friends pointed out that Enrique is a more attractive guy and a little more my type. In fact, he's the exact type that I described to them was my type when I first met them. So maybe it is just lust? He's grown up and become more my type that I lust after - tanned, tall, dark eyes, dark hair, fit body. It's the body that's become perfect over the years. He's also looking more manly. Although saying this, Matthew almost fits all the criteria but he has blue eyes and is white, oh and I admit his body isn't as hot but still.. he's an almost perfect fit and right now is the one I love most. Yes, that's right, he is.

So onto the title of this post.. Matthew and myself had a bit of a fight. Our first fight. It really upset me although I do sorta understand why he became angry...

Basically I happen to be someone who's very close with guys as friends.. and gets along with more guys than girls. My two best girlfriends and a few other close girlfriends being the exceptions, all my other closest and best friends are guys. Thus, when Enrique came back into my life as a best friend, I started spending quite a lot of time with him catching up, etc. I mean, I still got my daily sex twice a day (morning and night) quota from Matthew but well it did become more like booty calls.

Now I'm not saying that I've spent all my free time with Enrique, that's not true but when we've been hanging in a group the person I talk most to is Enrique. I wasn't aware of this until Matthew pointed it out.

So here was the argument (I'm guessing everything isn't exactly as I write since I wasn't exactly memorizing his and mine words as we argued...

I walked in through his apartment door (he has a big one bedroom apartment all to himself) and he was waiting on the sofa pretending to watch the telly but I could tell that he was just waiting for me. I had just been dancing with the gang at my club.

"Hey." I said. "Sorry I'm a little late. The guys kept dragging me onto the dance floor."

"Guys or guy?" He replied firmly. Looking at me in a disappointed and serious way.

"Excuse me?"

"Never mind."

"You can't just say something like that and not explain it." My voice was now getting serious. "Which guy are you referring to?"

"We both know the answer to that."

"If I knew I wouldn't be asking." I had a suspicion it was Enrique but I wasn't sure at all.

"Enrique. You been hanging with him again?"

"He is part of the gang now so yes, I have." Sometimes Matthew acts so overprotective and like he knows better than me which is a real massive turn off. Just because he's in his 30s doesn't mean he knows better, etc.

"From what I've seen, the gang could disappear and you wouldn't even notice."

"What?"

"I went to the club earlier and you were dancing with him. You were all over him."

I paused at this with a look of confusion. Was he spying on me? Doesn't he trust me? I wasn't all over him. I was dancing. I get close to all the people I dance with. Boy friends. Girl friends. Strangers. I finally replied: "Why didn't I see you at the club earlier?"

"I saw you dancing with him and I left."

"Why?"

"I wasn't going to stay and watch my girlfriend who I love more than she'll ever know virtually caressing the love of her life on the dance floor."

"I wasn't virtually caressing him. I was simply dancing. It was a sexy song so I probably did some sexy dancing. I would've danced like that with anyone who was with me. Even my girlfriends, you know that, and for your information, the love of my life is standing right in front of me and I love him more than he'll ever know." He shed a tear. "Pussy." He laughed. "Why are you so threatened by Enrique? All you're competing with is history and I'm not a big fan of history."

"I'm just finding it tough to see you so comfortable with him. I keep thinking any minute now, you're going to realise that you still want him."

I sighed, walked over to him and I gave him a sweet snog where he wrapped his hands on my waist and lifted me up onto my tip toes. "I love you so much so I'm not going anywhere but to your bedroom with you to have amazing make up because we just had our first argument." I smiled.

He smiled back. "Wow you're right. We're still make-up sex virgins." I giggled and he went to kiss me again this time a quick no tongue kiss. "I love you. I love you so much. I want to be with you forever. I can't bear thinking of losing you." I smiled even more. He bent down and picked me up over one shoulder and took me to the bedroom.. landing me on the bed where we had our usual amazing nighttime sex where we both sweated the night away.

Kisses, V.V.

The Update to The Blast from the Past

So I don't really wanna get into everything that's happened lately but it's been awkward and memories have plagued me but the main thing you should know is he's back in my life but as a friend and only a friend.

The reason he's back: He works with me now and has admitted he took the job because he found out I worked there.

The reason it's gotten more awkward: He's moved in with me and my roommates since one has moved out thus we needed a lodger asap and he needed a place to stay asap. Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time anyway.

What's our history: We fell in love. He was my first everything. He broke my heart by moving to Japan with his family without saying goodbye.

Why I was in shock to see him again: I hadn't seen him since he left. I ignored him at first and told him to go back to Japan and leave me alone. We argued a lot. He explained it was because he knew that if he did the goodbye thing he'd find it even harder to leave *so TV-material lol*. It sounded cheesy but the way he said it felt real. Plus even now he still can't lie to me. I can always tell when he's lying.. and he can tell when I am.. can't believe we can still read each other so easily.

What's our relationship now: We're becoming best friends again which is what we were before we fell in love. It's remarkable how easy it is to just get back to the old days. Weird too. We're childhood friends by the way so I guess it's sorta inevitable that we still have a strong connection even after a few years apart.

Sorry must dash. There is a very naked Matthew waiting for me.

Kisses, V.V.

The Blast From The Past

You know how when a relationship goes perfect and you sort of can't stand it because you keep thinking "there is no way everything can be so plain sailing". Well I had felt like this since the beginning of me and Matthew's relationship. I mean everything was just going too well. However, after much thought, I recently accepted this and just thought to myself "go with the flow" and I did but what a mistake that was...

Yesterday, I'm in my office doing my thing. Someone knocked on the door and I said "come in" as ya do...

"Hey." The man's voice said. I heard it but didn't answer since I was in the middle of writing. "You're busy then."

"Sorry." I said. "I'm just.." I looked up and froze.

"Hey stranger." He smiled. I couldn't smile back.

It was my first love.

Kisses, V.V.

The Ambition To Say "I Love You" Back

After he said the magic three words, I tried to say it many times.

Attempt 1: The Next Day

Lunchtime and I'm standing in my office practising how to say it back in my head.

A few minutes later he walks in.

"Hey. Sorry I'm late, something came up." He hands me my sandwich and Cherry Coke. "What is it that was so urgent."

"Oh um.. well.. um.. I just wanted to say..." He looked at me, anticipating the answer. "..About last night I.. I.. love.. y..our tongue." Crap. So close.

He smiled but looked obviously quite disappointed. "I try my best."

I smiled and giggled uncomfortably.

That was the first of many attempts. Lost count of how many times I attempted to say it.

The Accidental Success: A Week Later (19.08.2008)

We're at his house.

It's morning.

I'm in the shower.

He joins me.

We've just had our usual sweet sincere sex.

We start fooling around then he grabs my butt cheeks and pulls me up to my tiptoes and plants a kiss on my lips.. a prolonged peck. He stares into my eyes.

"I love you too." It just came out of my mouth and I had no intention of saying it at that moment but I did.

He closed his eyes in relief as if he was savoring the moment. After a few moments, he opened his eyes and stared at me again.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting for you to say it. It feels like I've been waiting years." He chuckled with happiness. He looked like a little schoolboy who'd gotten his way, it was completely cute.

We hugged each other and called in sick after some shower sex.

The bosses above us weren't happy but we didn't care.

We were naked the entire time.

Kisses, V.V.

The Perfect Night

We were at the point in our relationship where we were having hot steamy sex at night and sweet sincere sex in the morning. As much as I love both, we had sorta gotten into a routine (except the elevator sex) thus I felt it was time for me to do some spicing up.

I've been taking pole dancing classes for a while (one of my many hobbies) and I figured what better excuse to do my first show.

I have invested in a club in my neighbourhood and it's pretty popular not celebrity popular but after-work popular. It's a cross between the bar in Ally McBeal (there's a stage) and a regular nightclub. Normal people can perform which is what I love about it.

It was Monday night (11.08.2008) and I hadn't turned up to work and called in sick. I didn't sleep over at Matthew's (the first night I hadn't since we started dating). It was on purpose. I spent Sunday night planning and Monday day preparing...

He finishes work at 6pm.

He went home. On the table he would have found a note from me saying: "Come to the club at 10pm. Keep your suit on." (The club is closed on Sundays and Mondays.)

I was waiting at the club getting everything prepared. The stage was wide and had a pole and there was a sort of bridge to the second stage in the shape of a circle with about a 6-foot diameter in the middle of the dance floor. On it was a plain wooden chair - for him of course.

At 8pm exactly he knocked. I didn't answer, it was open and I was waiting next to the pole. He came in and I assume he saw the sign on the back of the chair saying: "Sit here." I heard him sit down.

The caretaker who was in the back switched on the stage lights which were set to a romantic red tint with a spotlight on the pole. The lights around the smaller circle stage he was on were also switched on. (The caretaker should have left after this but who knows..) I was wearing a lacy khaki lingerie set with suspenders and stockings, 4-inch black heels and a micro-mini pleated black slightly flared skirt.

He must have seen the remote to the stereo at his feet. He pressed play. Naughty girl by Beyonce played and I did my thing.

I used the pole.

I used the stage.

I used my flexibility.

I danced all the way to him. He had taken off his blazer and tie by this point.

I lap danced for him. At one point I sat on his lap and felt his already hard cock.

When he couldn't wait anymore, he grabbed me and kissed me. It was soft at first then it got deeper. The song ended after the kiss. Since it was the album in the stereo, the next song played.

He sucked hard on my nipple through my bra. He undid my bra, it fell off and he continued sucking on my left while grabbing and caressing my right. I moaned in pleasure giving out soft whimpers now and again. My nipples were rock hard and I was already wet. His cock was almost breaking through his trousers. I unzipped them and pulled out his big dick. I kneeled on the floor and gave him a BJ. When I was sucking his balls, I was wanking his cock. When I was sucking his cock, I was caressing his balls. His heavy breaths getting heavier even giving out gasps now and again. About 2 or 3 minutes later, he started to say he was going to cum and he did. I swallowed and he grabbed me up to kiss me. He didn't seem to care that after taste was in my mouth.

He got out of the chair and threw it off the stage. He lay me on the ground and held down my wrists. He kneeled over me. He kissed me softly. No matter how rough he was during sex, his kisses were nearly always soft and loving. I love that.

He started to suck my neck leaving a red mark. It felt so good. His crotch pushed up against me as he did it and I felt that he was hard again. He then rolled to my left and hurriedly took off both his trousers and boxers. Calvin Klein again. What a body. I took off my knickers and I rolled onto my side facing away from him.

He lifted my skirt out of the way and spooned me. My favourite position. I fingered my clit as he thrusted, he caressed my left nipple - sometimes pinching them hard and flicking them. At some points I'd even reach back to caress his balls.

After about 10 minutes or more and many a position later, I ended up on top and I almost screamed: "I'm cumming!" and he shouted back: "Me too!" A few seconds later we orgasmed. It was so good, I almost shed a tear. The spasms within me were so strong I collapsed in his arms and we clung to each other. He was so warm against my body.

Our breathing took quite a while to get back to normal but when it was he kissed me softly again. A long kiss and though soft, I felt as though I could feel his strength.

"I love you." He said, looking in my eyes with a look I had never seen from him before. It's hard to explain. It was as if a part of him had somehow become more serious, more mature. He put his hand round my head and lay my head on his chest. I clung tightly and so did he. His grasp around me was so urgent yet warm.

"I'll never let you go." He whispered. "Never."

I didn't say it back. I was just in so much shock but I smiled to myself. I was so happy. It felt too good to be true.

Typing this I realize it was the perfect night.. just perfect.

Kisses, V.V.

The Elevator And Us

Me.

Matthew.

End of a date.

Stuck in an elevator.

Hardcore elevator sex.

Kisses, V.V.